The simplicity of dog

So, I've decided I want to be a dog. May seem like a random choice, I mean dogs can do some pretty nasty things, right? Well if you think about it, people do some pretty terrible things too. We're often catty and at times just flat out rude to one another. This post is for those of you who somehow tend to end up on the recieving end of all that bitchiness. I mean, I'm sure I'm not alone when I express how tired I've become of chronically incouragable people.... so, I have a fantasy. I somehow magically morph into a domesticated house pet and my problems become so much easier to handle. Very little fuss or muss, really. Here's why...
Let's use my boy dog Sir Lancelot as an excellent example. I just moved into a new house this week. The neighbor dogs are a little...ummm...we'll call it yappy and high strung. Lancelot walked right up to the chain link fence to introduce himself to his future playmates. He primly sat at the fence line, tail wagging, making no sound. All the while the other precious little pups continued to carry on and appeared to be having a fit of sorts. When Lancelot had enough of thier noise he stood, (I thought to walk away) and hiked his leg on our new little neighbors. I was horrified and laughing hysterically all at the same time.
As I was relaying this little tidbit to a friend, she pointed out, "Wouldn't it be nice to deal with people that way? Ya know when they're really irritating you and just won't shut up." I thought about this for a moment.
I mean don't you think the world might be a little bit better if we didn't have all this pent up aggression toward each other. I'm sure people would be much nicer, otherwise it's like "Fuck you, here's some pee buddy."
Ahhhh.....the simplicity of dog.